Assumption or Truth
Halleluja!
2 weeks ago I shared that sleepless nights had a big toll on me. The benefit of sharing this with you was receiving very diverse comments, and entering the transformation.
Mostly the comments were compassionate and understanding, and it really made me feel held by a larger field, by all the moms who went or are going through something similar.
There were a couple of comments questioning whether it was needed to wake up so often at night and if it was of service to anyone really. These questions came from men. They caused some irritation in me as in "Come on, you don't get what it means to be a mother with all the instincts that come with it, and I am already doing my very best including having done the research myself!".
As days went by, these questions were working on me, and one day I woke up after another sleepless night and asked these very same questions to myself: "Is it really serving anyone of us? Alisia?, "Does she really need to eat at night at 10 months of age?" "What if it's my assumption that I am doing a good service to her by waking up so often and eventually having broken nights?" I remembered someone saying to me that babies need to eat at night for their brain development. "Is this true for her age now?" I wondered.
These questions created an opening in me for a CHANGE. The very next day, I went to a homeopath and got some wonder pills for me and Alisia. They made her sleep deeper and longer, but she still woke up 3-5 times a night. And after a few days of not seeing a real progress, I came across an ad on Facebook from Sleep Sense addressing sleepless nights for mothers. I immediately felt a YES to this 14-days online program and signed up. It's been 4 days and 4 nights since I've been following it now with Dana Obleman and the results have been absolutely amazing!
I took a decision to stop feeding Alisia in the night based on the explanation in the course by Dana (with whom I resonate at the heart level big time!) that she no longer needs these feeds and that it's now simply a habit for her to fall asleep this way. And that if I continue the way I was doing until now, we might have sleepless nights for months and even years in the future. Ouch! It was a huge wake up call for me. Because I hoped: "Maybe Alisia really needs it now and soon she won't anymore." or "Maybe it's nature's way to keep milk production high." I realized that mother instincts can't always be trusted as they can be fogged with assumptions which are not true. Great learning!
The result speaks for itself. The last 3 nights have been totally different than any other night I had in the last 4 months. The night before she woke up only once and fell asleep after 5 minutes. And last night, Alisia simply slept through the night 9pm to 5am, and woke up in the early morning ready to cheer the new day! She feels even calmer and more energetic during the days, because she also now had long uninterrupted sleep.
Thank you, dear community, for holding me with compassion, it was like a warm blanket, and also for your powerful questions, MEN, which opened up some powerful and so needed transformation.
With me having more energy now, I can be more creative both at home and at work. And also it's so important as I am about to start 1 full year of intense studies where I need my energy high. Besides, I can spend a much better quality time now with family when we are well rested.
Where do you also struggle and believe that it is justified?
Which assumptions do you hold as truth?
Grateful.